Returning to the Garden of Eden: Is it Good or Bad or Is It Just What it Is?

Posted on March 14, 2013 by David Durand

Would you choose to live in presence today?

I’ve shared a series of photos on my Live In Presence™ Facebook Page and asked what people thought the image was.  Here they are in the same sequence:

Good or Bad?

First Image

Is it good or bad by the way?

Now for the second image of the same object:

What-Is-This-#2

Now is it clearer? And by the way, is this “thing” good or bad?

Again, is it good or bad?

And finally, the low power view.

What-Is-This-#3

OK, so now you know?

Now that you see the entire structure, is it good or bad?

So what do the pictures mean?  The first picture shows an amazing work of art, which turns out at lower power (the last shot) to be a work of nature, or mold growing on a dead leaf sitting on the cement of my driveway in the last shot above.  So is it beautiful or hideous?  It represents decay and death, but is somehow interesting, even attractive.  The point of this is that things that we end up labeling as good and bad are not inherently either.  They just are what they are.  It’s not a bad leaf or a good leaf, bad mold or good mold.  It is a leaf that simply has mold on it.  The mold is busy surviving and the dead leaf is simply hanging around fulfilling the role of the dead leaf.

And so what?  Well it turns out that these pictures are a visual representation of one of the greatest spiritual secrets, which is how we can return to the Garden of Eden where we would still be had Adam and Eve not separated from God by entering their human minds and started to label things as good and bad.  They were perfectly happy until they started making ego based decisions of good and bad, such as the idea that their naked bodies were something to be ashamed of and that they could have their own ego driven way (think and be independent of their divine guidance and do what they wanted).  They thought they could be happy and survive in a state of separation from God/Universe.

So what are some examples of how using the labels of “good” and “bad” impact our health, our wealth and our relationships?

Let’s look at health.  Is cancer bad?  Is cancer good?  Or is it just cancer?  Most humans would say that the appearance of cancer is not just bad, but awful.  After all, it can kill the body, so it must be bad. 

But how could cancer be good?  It could teach some people how to value their lives and their relationships for the remainder of their lives, something that would have otherwise eluded them their entire lifetime.   At the human level, it’s a hard way to learn this lesson, but the point of this life in my view is to stretch to a higher point in consciousness and simultaneously to experience the joy of living.  “Bad” things that happen challenge us to move higher.  They do not occur in order to punish us, although we may feel that way initially.  There are countless examples of how people with cancer have inspired millions of other human beings to overcome their limitations, even when their lives were shortened.

In the wealth realm, is going bankrupt bad?  It feels bad at the time for those who have to endure it.  Their credit may be shot for a while and their reputation may suffer in their community, but we all know that countless successful entrepreneurs have gone through bankruptcy to emerge victorious in multimillion dollar, even billion dollar businesses.  Successful entrepreneurship is fraught with failures, but when learning occurs, the failures appear to be lessons, not threats to one’s existence.  The ego thinks failures are “the end of me.”  The ego does not believe in redemption and eternity.  Ultimately, nothing can kill you if you are in fact eternal.

In the relationship realm, is divorce bad?  Some label it and claim it’s bad without question, and there is plenty of suffering with it for all those involved, but others note that when children are raised in an environment of conflict, they suffer and may be traumatized for years.  So it’s not actually good or bad.  It’s just something that two people decide.  Not that I feel divorce should be taken lightly, but what happens following the divorce turns out to be more important than the event itself.

The principle of not labeling things as good and bad brings us to 100% responsibility for our lives.  Instead of blaming ourselves or others for what happens to us, either to our bodies, our finances, or our relationships, we simply take responsibility.  As my “Presence Definition” page on my website states at the top, our experiences are the exact reflection of our consciousness, no more or less.  There is no blame in that, but there is responsibility.

If we have a bodily disease, sick finances, or an unhealthy relationship, it’s just a condition, a condition that is temporary and there to show us where our work is, where our growth is as human beings attempting to return to the Garden of Eden.  How do you move beyond the labels of good and bad and end up in peace and joy?  My method is one of transcendence to a place of no attachments and no aversions and if you would like to learn the “how to,” please take my  Introductory Course.  It will bridge you back to the Garden of Eden to unconditional happiness.  If you take the attitude when something “bad” happens that it is in fact not good or bad despite the human appearance of it, you’ll be one step closer to that place.

Here is an exercise for today:

List all the things you consider to be bad.  Sit with each until you find one way in which the “bad” thing is actually good.  Write that down as in “It’s actually good/partially good because…”

Next time, I’ll discuss how we can reframe our attitudes in transcendence toward good things too.  If you want to be notified of the next post, you can subscribe here: Questions of Consciousness™

Those who sign up will also be invited to a free one hour call I’ll be doing called “What’s Good and What’s Bad” at 11 am ET on March 23rd.  You can sign up at the previous link.  You do not have to have taken the intro course to attend.

Would you choose to live in presence today?

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Copyright © 2013 by Universal Ideas, LLC.  All rights reserved.

Posted in abundance, attachments and aversions, full realization, Health, laws of success, presence, relationships, Unconditional love | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Abundance Without Limits

Posted on September 13, 2012 by David Durand

Would you choose to live in presence today?

Unlimited Abundance

We limit our abundance in one place – in our own consciousness.

Abundance is unlimited.  Sit with that and at a deeper level – do not program yourself to believe it; instead, seek to know on the inside, at a deeper level, that it is true.

What is my abundance definition?  I like one that I’ve heard from multiple sources which is “it is having enough so you are able to do what you’d like to do in life when you would like to do it.”  Clearly, the actual picture and meaning of abundance varies tremendously from person to person.  Some people live on relatively little and yet are much happier than those considered to be wealthy.  Many who are abundant lack the feeling of abundance and have therefore not achieved it, not internally.

An investing world associate of mine, Porter Stansberry of Stansberry Associates Investment Research, on whose website I wrote in the form of a blog (then called a “thread”) for several years as a major independent unpaid and unedited contributor, recently said in an article on a particular thought of scarcity, namely that we could run out of oil, which is often referred to as “Peak Oil,” :

“Look around. Observe that the same kind of abundance tends to manifest itself in almost every area of human endeavor. 

“The simple fact is, the more energy we use, the more we discover. Likewise, the more computers we make, the better they get. The more food we grow, the more efficiently we can grow it. This so-called experience curve is the result of the application of the human mind. “

I would move this one step further beyond mind, which is restricted to the sum total of our thoughts and is therefore limited, and say that it is the result of our consciousness, individual and collective, that allows for abundance to show up as it is needed and even to run over.  You are well provided for essentially if you “know that” deeply.  You can work with consciousness on the individual level and also on the level of your community and ultimately come from a place of having abundance for the entire world.  When you know that you are abundant by nature, you have abundance for yourself and others, and from that place of having abundance, rather than lacking it, more shows up.

So check right now and ask:

“Do I have the sense that I have abundance or that I lack abundance?” 

If it is the former, great, but you may still want to consider thoughts you may have about increasing your abundance from its current level and particularly the way you feel about it.  What do you feel a “life of abundance” is?  Well, that is up to you.  

If we do not have the sense of abundance and prosperity, we clearly need to shift our consciousness in those moments.  Start by sitting with the knowledge that you cannot create what you are not aligned with and that this is the time for you to make the decision to become aligned with abundance.  Once you make that decision, you can take steps to correct the blocks in your consciousness that keep the abundance you desire at bay.  First demonstrate it for yourself, then you can help others demonstrate it.  And of course, we can give to others as we raise our own consciousness and abundance.

Become aligned with abundance in any way you know how.  It is not by begging and pleading with God/Universe, because all that is about lack.

I believe that if you learn to live in presence, you will live in abundance.

Would you choose to live in presence today?

For those who would like to learn more about the “how to” of living in abundance without limits, be sure to read about my course.  It’s described on my homepage here (please scroll down a bit when you get there):  The Course

There are also other articles on the laws of abundance here:

The Law of Abundance

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The wonderful photo of the abundant marketplace is from this link:

Bjorn Giesenbauer

Copyright © 2012 by Universal Ideas, LLC.  All rights reserved.

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Swimming in the Ocean of Female Emotion: A Survival Manual for Men Who Love Feminine Women

Posted on May 30, 2012 by David Durand

Would you choose to live in presence today?

The Feminine Woman: On the Sea of Emotion

The Feminine Woman On the Sea of Emotion by Daniela Panfilov

When a woman tests a man and she is coming from her feminine essence, she is testing him because she loves him, not to make him wrong.  She is urging him to attain his greatness, to give his true gift in the world, rather than sit around watching TV or begging her for sex or making excuses.  She wants love making, not sex, with a man who knows his divine purpose and lives it.  This is why she tests him.

This is not to say that the cycles of testing do not ease in their amplitude, but as David Deida proclaims in his awesome book, “The Way of the Superior Man,” feminine women never stop testing their man and that is the secret, for both men and women.  When you know they will never stop, because they shouldn’t, you can relax and be present and simply live happily with your woman and love her completely.  (Note: Deida points out that the same theory applies in relationships of all kinds and polarities, but this is written for the masculine man and feminine woman.  In this article, I share my take on David’s major concepts and add inspired understandings of my own and the entire section on medical and psychiatric causes of non-presence, which should not have been left out of his book in my opinion.)

You do not want her to stop testing you, because you want your woman to be the complete, complex woman that she is.  Without that polarity, she would be boring and she’s not, because she is a real woman born to test you, to move you off your butt and onto your dime in life.

I’ve witnessed that personal growth can dampen the sharpness of the testing as experienced by both the man and the woman, but again, the goal is absolutely not to remove the tests, because you want her to test you, to move you to your greatness as a human being and as a man when you lose your mark.  This is part of her expression of presence, her languaging of presence in the divine feminine way.  You provide your “masculine presence” as I’ll call it in return as she needs it as well.  Her testing is simply an expression of her “feminine presence” as I’ll call it.   Seeing the truth and acting on it is all a part of presence in my view.  The key is to see past the emotional content to the truth that sets you free as you allow yourself to hear her feminine voice.

And of course, you can and should get back on your dime through your own commitment to being present too, but if you don’t, she won’t let you down by not testing you.  Wimpy men call this nagging when it’s not.  Nagging over trivia is something completely different and has nothing to do with the divine feminine.  Feminine women test; they do not nag.

When the ocean is stirred and whether it is “that time of the month” or not (that hormonal back story is immaterial and is an excuse for men to hide from the truth), a man remains present for his woman with appropriate humor, caresses, and attention to her needs.  You do not give in to her every need, because that is also a test.  When you give into a need and in doing so violate your truth, she knows it, and she will love you less, not more, for giving into her.  Remember that this is about the truth, not about either party getting what he/she selfishly wants.

Feminine truth telling is not a hiding place for women who want to be emotional for no reason and remain girls.   This is not a concept of copping out and acting out.  The emotion, the passion and the intensity serve a purpose; they serve the truth.  The feminine essence is about truth telling and when it’s not, the man needs to stand for his truth and not waver.  Yes, that is tricky, because both you and she have to distinguish standing in truth and being stubborn.

If there is a consistent pattern of non-presence and untruths, then the relationship is dying or dead and intervention is needed.  The person you are with may have either a physical disorder or a personality disorder, which in the latter case can respond to intensive psychotherapy according to the National Institute of Mental Health (and I say also to commitment to presence), but the person has to want it.  They must want healing and presence in their life.

The other possibility that must be ruled out are medical causes of emotional non-presence, which can be caused by hormonal imbalances in many women.  Female hormone imbalances generally can occur any time after the age of 35, much earlier than most women realize, and certain hormone producing tumors can also cause major imbalances.

If there is no medical cause, then a personality disorder may be the issue.  One of the unfortunate hallmarks of personality disorders is the lack of self-insight and the unwillingness such a person has to do his/her own inner work.  They may even vilify the person bringing their issue of untruthfulness to attention.  If a person with such a disorder is truly committed to change, healing can occur, but if not, do not seek to change who they are.  Unless invited, you are not the other person’s healer.

In the absence of medical causes, if she tells numerous untruths over and over or even a significant untruth again and again, and does not yield to your presence no matter how consistently present you are, then you must question the relationship itself.  Relationships are about growth and if both partners are not committed to growth, then the relationship has no life.  No, I am not talking about running at the first sign of trouble.  That is fear based.

What if she is telling the truth while being emotional?  Then she is attempting to shift your perspective, so you see the truth that is there to be seen.  Your actions will then be aligned with your new truth, which happens to be hers as well.  You do not fight truth whether it arises from the core of your being or from hers.  You stay with her and wait for the waves to pass through, floating in presence on the sea of her femininity.  You are not just a man after all, you are a humble yet “superior man.”  She is your divine feminine counterpart, masterfully designed to guide you to your greatest self and highest consciousness.

So if she delivers her truth emotionally, LISTEN intently!  Hear whether it is actually untruth or just an uncomfortable truth that you have yet to learn.  That is, is she in fact right?

Remember men, the testing will never stop no matter how evolved we or our feminine women become.  It is not supposed to stop and that is the fun and the glory of our feminine women who bathe us clean in their “feminine presence.”  It is how we meet each test that counts.  Yes, you could run from the tests, but if you stay and meet her “feminine presence” with your “masculine presence,” you will both experience a truly healing and joyous relationship.

Would you choose to live in presence today?

If you would like to learn more about the “how to” of living in presence, be sure to take my course.  It’s described on my homepage here (please scroll down a bit when you get there):  The Course

NOTE: I am a physician by training but the above article does not represent medical or psychological advice.  It represents my opinion on presence.

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And if you liked the article, would you please share it on Facebook and any other place that you like to share things?  Thank you for paying it forward.

The beautiful photo of the feminine woman is titled “Anya” and is from:

Danila Panfilov

Copyright © 2012 by Universal Ideas, LLC.  All rights reserved.


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The Law of Creation: What is in the Forefront of Your Consciousness?

Posted on May 12, 2012 by David Durand

Would you choose to live in presence today?

Young Thinker at Work with the Law of Creation

Young Thinker at Work with the Law of Creation

Notice today what is in the forefront of your consciousness.  This is what you are focusing your attention upon, so this is what you are now creating.  The term “law of attraction” is fine as long as you realize that the law is really one of creation.  Thought creates and if it creates an attraction, so be it, but that thing that was attracted had to be created first.   So that brings us back to the law of creation.

Just write down your immediate thoughts about your day, your week, and your future.  Nothing can be created except that which is created through thoughts, whether they are intuitively based or driven by karma (the past).

If you have thoughts of doubt, hesitation, and difficulties, you cannot create other than that which flows from those.  On the other hand, if you have unimpeded thoughts of faith, certainty, and success, you can create nothing other than success, health, and loving relationships.  It is impossible to experience anything that you have not held in consciousness, even if momentarily.  So get clear about what you want in life and you will experience it as explained on my “definition of presence and creation” page: Presence Definition and Creation.

There is one more trick and my course addresses that.  We must transcend any feelings of negativity that surround our thoughts even if they are positive.  For example, if we have a positive thought, but have doubt associated with that thought, we have negated that thought, and are now unable to move in the positive direction.  Forward motion and success flow from transcendence of negativity and entry into the allowing space of conscious presence.

Write down your dreams.  Transcend them.  Allow them.  Creation in Presence is what we are here for.  Give the gifts that you were meant to uniquely give to others, and receive your overflowing good in the abundance of reciprocity.  You will live your dreams in Presence.

Wonderful photo above is by James Jordan: Lost in Thought

Would you choose to live in presence today?

This is an excerpt from my book on living life in presence.  If you would like to learn more about the “how to” of living in presence, be sure to take my course.  It’s described on my homepage here (please scroll down a bit when you get there):  The Course

Join us on Facebook: Like “Live In Presence” on Facebook Here

And if you liked the article, would you please share it on Facebook and any other place that you like to share things?  Thank you for paying it forward.

Copyright © 2012 by Universal Ideas, LLC.  All rights reserved.

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Making Your Own Decisions: From Confusion to Knowing

Posted on March 30, 2012 by David Durand

Would you choose to live in presence today?

From Confusion to the Ways of Knowing

From Confusion to the Ways of Knowing

Be careful about consulting others about your decisions.  They see your life through their own filters, many of which you and they may not even be aware of.  Do you want to make your major life decisions based on their fears?

They also will tend to tell you what you yourself are saying to win your approval.  The classic “Yes, you’re so right man/sweetie!”  Of course, they mean well, but they may not understand that a true friend tells us what we do not necessarily want to hear.  That would be the classic “You are so full of crap!”  In any case, be sure to move past what they say to your own understanding.

What about going to psychics?  Psychics may not help you unfortunately.  Why?  Because all that 99.999% of them can tell you is what is going on at a particular time and project that forward, and furthermore, a number of them have their own “stuff” in the way, which blurs their vision.  For example, if they are judgmental, their reading will be judgmental and they will mislead you.

At best, a psychic simply sees the current picture, which is transformed when you are transformed.  If you never changed, they could tell you what will happen to you, but you do change, so they have no clear view of what will happen in your life.  Furthermore, anyone in a high enough consciousness to know absolutely what will happen to you would never tell you!  They would want you to come to your own understanding.  The problem with psychics is that you will not learn to develop your own innate intuitive abilities if a psychic becomes your crutch.  A psychic who truly wanted to help would use the information solely for helping you grow, and teach you to become intuitive yourself.  Some do, but most do not restrict their practice in this way.  So again, move to your own understanding.  Learn how to develop your own intuition.

How do you do that?  Of the ways of knowing, what is the path you can rely upon?  When you are transcendent in regard to any subject, you will “feel quiet” about it.  If you think about a subject and feel reactive, you are not done yet.  You have not gotten to “quiet.”  You are still living in the past, and your past is still directing your present and future.  Use whatever process you use to bring yourself to “quiet” and from there, make your own decision.  Your decision will be as clear as you are at that point.

Yes, just because you felt quiet when you came to your decision does not mean you haven’t overlooked some of your “stuff.”  If it turns out you took a “wrong turn,” it was based on your remaining “stuff” around the subject, “stuff” that you kept hidden from yourself.  The good news?  Once you transcend that remaining “stuff,” you will know your perfect place, who the perfect people are for you, and your perfect purpose.  In true quiet there is only true knowing.

Would you choose to live in presence today?

If you would like to learn more about arriving at a place of “quiet” and true knowing, please consider taking my course.  It’s described on my homepage here (please scroll down a bit when you get there):  The Course

And if you liked the article, would you please share it on Facebook and any other place that you like to share things?  Thanks.

I’ve written previously on how Mary used her intuition to make her decision to give birth here:

Mary’s Transcendence to Motherhood

Copyright © 2012 by Universal Ideas, LLC.  All rights reserved.

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Can You Stare at Someone “Unconditionally”? The Nuances of Mutuality and Unconditional love

Posted on March 8, 2012 by David Durand

Would you choose to live in presence today?

Can You Stare in Mutuality and Unconditional Love?

Can You Stare in Mutuality and Unconditional Love?

Recently I was discussing a quote on Facebook posted by Stacie Cole.  Here it is: “I want someone who knows that I am not really perfect yet he stares at me like I am the most perfect woman he has ever seen. ; )”  I commented/joked that loving staring needed to be “unconditional staring.”  But maybe it was no joke!  😉   The concept would be staring based upon unconditional love, not attachment.

In certain contexts, the word “stare” implies the lack of mutuality, so that could not be “unconditional staring” it would seem.  One person feels the other is staring, because he/she does not seek the attention and feels the act is uncomfortable in some way.  So staring in that context at least is not mutual by definition, so it cannot be considered loving unconditionally.  Look at the picture of the couple above before you read on and see if you believe that their stare is “attachment” or true “unconditional staring”!  😉

Some say love must be mutual and unconditional.  Is mutuality a separate idea or related to unconditional love?  My view is that mutuality is a given when there is unconditional love, because in unconditional love one would never seek to force anyone to do anything that the other did not also want.   Mutuality is a practice that separated beings use at times to come together to find unconditional love or if unconditional love is already present, mutuality is one of the natural results.  If any understanding between two people is based upon unconditional love, it must be mutual.

Mutuality by itself is not saying very much.  If something is mutual between two people, it may in fact not be based upon unconditional love.  For example, it may be mutual that two people go hunting for fawns, but it certainly is not unconditional love that causes them to kill baby deer together!  Two people can stare at each other for reasons of complete attachment, which could be completely mutual (“Klingons in love”), but again, lacking in unconditional love.  They are attached, not truly in unconditional love.

But while mutuality is “not enough,” it flows from unconditional love as part of its nature.  In unconditional love, we want the other person to simply “be what they are,” and love the other as s/he is and the consequence is that everything we do together is mutual.

Conclusion:   Mutuality is not enough, but is a natural consequence in a relationship that flows from unconditional love.  My take is that the couple above is engaged in a stare that involves unconditional love and of course, mutuality.  They both seem very happy to be staring at each other and seem to be engaged in a giving way.  So there is such a thing as “unconditional staring”!  Stare at them a bit and see what you think!  lol

Would you choose to live in presence today?

If you would like to learn more about discovering unconditional love in your relationships, consider taking my course.  It’s described on my homepage here (please scroll down a bit when you get there):  The Course

And I’ll ask  ; )  – if you liked the article, would you please share it on Facebook and any other place that you like to share things?  Thanks.

Copyright © 2012 by Universal Ideas, LLC.  All rights reserved.

Posted in mutuality, presence, relationships, spiritual laws, Unconditional love | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

The Law of Allowing

Posted on February 11, 2012 by David Durand

Would you choose to live in presence today?

The most powerful word in the creation of the life you want is the word “allow.”  The Secret at least in places obscured the secret that when we are fully out of the way and allowing healing, abundance, and love in relationships, they emerge without any real effort.  We may be called upon to take numerous actions in our allowing process, but we enjoy doing what we do, because we are in alignment with what we are.

There is no power in ego-derived mental or physical effort.  Let’s be clear here that I am talking about the feeling of effort inside, NOT the making of effort outside.  The law of allowing says that the FEELING of effort is resistance, which inhibits the flow of good in our lives, because resistance is ego.  Any sense of effort = ego = resistance to our good.  When we feel something is hard, we are experiencing resistance.  We can then ask “What am I resisting?”  “In what ways am I impeding the flow of my good?”  Once the feelings of resistance have been transcended, love is re-established in our lives.

Beyond resistance is both the flow of love and our good.  The one power flows through us unimpeded from the one source as we serve the highest good of all, including our own, from this place of allowing.  From that one source, everything we need appears exactly as it is needed.  We do “ask” for the things we want, but we certainly don’t have to beg.

Pleading with God/Universe is not asking; it is begging.  If we must plead, we must, but when we realize God/Universe does not need instructions from us, we can give up our pleading, surrender all sense of effort and simply receive our thoughts of what is needed, simultaneously knowing that everything is being taken care of even as we may take numerous actions,  appearing to others to be “working hard.”  Inside, there is no resistance, and we experience the joy of the fulfillment of our health, abundance, and love in our relationships according to the law of allowing.  Truly powerful, yet nice and easy, allowing.

Would you choose to live in presence today?

If you would like to learn more about the process of allowing, consider taking my course.  It’s described on my homepage here (please scroll down a bit when you get there):  The Course

And I’ll ask  ; )  – if you liked the article, would you please share it on Facebook and any other place that you like to share things?  Thanks.

Copyright © 2012 by Universal Ideas, LLC.  All rights reserved.

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Judgement Qualifies Us for the Crazy Club: Taking the Vow of Nonjudgement

Posted on January 14, 2012 by David Durand

Would you choose to live in presence today?

First, congratulations if you even dared to click on this link!  Really.  You are truly willing to face yourself if you tackle the issue of pride and judgement (1). 

Lester Levenson pointed out that pride/judgement was the hardest thing for people to see in themselves.  He used to say “Pride is a hide.”  It’s subtle at times because it is the “highest of the negative energies.”  It hid from me for sure.  Some I saw but some I didn’t.  Before I learned of raising one’s consciousness, and even after that, I personally suffered great losses because of it, which led to my vow as explained below.  Ultimately, we decide where our consciousness goes and where it does not go.   As the masters tell us, it’s simple even if it is not always easy.  And it can be done.

Judgements in relationships, whether at work or personal and intimate, are about us.  When we deal with that, we’ll decide to listen rather than judge.  Judges don’t learn about people.  They separate from people.  Then they blame others for the separation of course, because the judgement continues.

Most often when one person is judging in a relationship, the other one is too.  If nothing else, the one who feels more judged, judges him/herself and may judge the other for judging them.  It’s a silly circle.  But it can be stopped.

We all judge ourselves to some extent, because we think it helps in some way to make us better.  We also judge other people because we have the misguided belief that it will make that other person better, when often all it does is engender resentment and separation.  Remember, judges separate.  So when the other person creates separation (pulls away), we should see if we were judging him/her.   We need to look to see if we provided the push out the door or if we created the distance in the bedroom or the boardroom and take responsibility for that.  We need to watch what comes out of our mouths with vigilance.

What if the other person is doing something wrong or unhelpful in the relationship?  Simply communicate about it.  Try being “open and honest.”  What a great recommendation that is for any relationship.  Find out more without judgement though.  It can be done.  Never hold whatever is arising against the other simply by realizing that none of us knows what we are doing in the areas of our life where we are unconscious.  “We know not what we do.”

The bitter irony for the judge in us is that when we judge, WE are being unconscious by judging a quality in the other as bad.  It’s not in fact bad.  It is simply where the other person is at that moment.  Allow for change.  Why compound it with our own unconsciousness of judgement?  Isn’t there enough suffering already?

Who else is going to stop our insanity?  Let’s stop it and go cold turkey – no judgements of even the weather for today.  Start again tomorrow, even if you blow it today.  Write down any judgements that come to you and transcend them then or later.

For every moment we are unconscious, we are all a bit screwed up, nuts, insane.  Take your pick.  I’ve heard it said that “all women are crazy and all men are jerks.”  Being a jerk is crazy too.   And being a judge is crazy as I’ve explained.  So let’s be fair and admit that we’re all a bit crazy until we are not.  If we are at least part human, we make judgements and this alone qualifies us for the “Crazy Club.”  This perspective makes judging ourselves and others truly ludicrous.  Judgment is unconsciousness.

Let’s take note of our own contribution to collective unconsciousness and make a decision to be present without judgement with those we love.

And isn’t it easier to be in faith with the other person and KNOW they have what it takes, whatever is going on in their life?  When we stop dumbing down the lives of others and assuming they cannot help themselves unless we do the helping, we are becoming more conscious.

The truth is that no one needs help from anyone, because ultimately we all stumble upon the truth.  Mommy and Daddy, you do not have to save Jimmy.  Support and nurture and guide Jimmy’s education and development for sure, but drop the judgements.

The judge believes he/she has the ultimate perspective on life.  But the word perspective implies there are other points of view.  Our judgment could be wrong for so many reasons.  Why speculate?  Why not find out about the other person rather than simply sentencing them to our unconscious judgments?  Let’s stop it!

Simply be with the person you are judging by suspending judgement, listening with a strong intention to understand them, and loving them exactly as they are.  Be completely present with them.  In doing so, you will learn not only about the other person, but about yourself.  What you then become is yours to decide.  What he/she becomes is not your business and never was, but your love will beautifully free the other to be what they are, their best self.  Finally, you will be free as well.  Wow, two free people in love!  What a concept!  And yes, it applies to your boss as well as to your lover.

We change by deciding to practice non-judgement in all our relationships rather than practicing judgement.  A relationship’s success depends on two people being free to be what they are.  Join me in the sacred vow of non-judgement.  This is the moment to begin.  It is a vow that is freeing.

See if this resonates, and if so, sit quietly with the thought:

I allow myself to be with each person in my life without judgement, with complete unconditional acceptance and love for who they are in this moment.   I free him/her to be what he/she is.

Would you choose to live in presence today?

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NOTE: This is an excerpt from my book on raising consciousness that will be further edited prior to publication. If you have any feedback, please send me a comment via the “Contact Me” page above. Thank you.

Footnotes:

1. Although “judgment” is the preferred spelling in the U.S., “judgement” is the favored spelling in Britain and worldwide (around 4:1 per Google and as this is the worldwide web, I had to make a “judgement.”  ; )

Copyright © 2012 by Universal Ideas, LLC.  All rights reserved.

Posted in forgiveness, judgement, judgment, presence, pride, relationships, Unconditional love | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Fear, Doubt, Intuition, and Fulfillment: Mary’s Transcendence to Motherhood

Posted on December 23, 2011 by David Durand

Would you choose to live in presence today?

The story of Mary is inspiring to those of all faiths.  Why?  Her story is about faith itself.  Mary was not ready to be the virgin mother from the start.  She is a wonderful example of the understanding of the role of doubt, fear, and intuition in our consciousness.  How do we move from fear through doubt to a true intuition where we KNOW what to do in the deepest possible way?

When the angel Gabriel came to her to tell her she would bear a child named Jesus without having been with Joseph, her initial reaction was one of fear.  After all, she had not had any visits from angels before.  She “should” be afraid.  The verse in Luke says “But when she saw him, she was troubled at his saying…” [a]

What?  Mary, the virgin mother, was troubled, had cold feet and was not ready to marry Joseph and have this child?  Yes, she was afraid at first, but what she then decided to do was to examine her fear consciously to see if it was valid or not.  She brought presence to her fear.

Well, it was a process she went through.  She actually then went into her head a bit, because she had never been with Joseph in the biblical sense, so things definitely did not add up in her mind.  So, still in doubt, she asked Gabriel, “How can this be, since I do not know a man?”[b]

Gabriel then explained that she was being favored by God, that “For with God nothing will be impossible” and that she need not concern herself with the details, but he did not stop there.  He also was kind enough to appeal to her knowledge of other miracles that she herself had witnessed.  He said, “Now indeed, Elisabeth your relative has also conceived a son in her old age; and this is now the sixth month for her who was called barren.  For with God nothing will be impossible.”[b]

Elisabeth had given up on having a child.  She then gave birth to John the Baptist.  So Gabriel was compassionate enough to show Mary that she had the understanding within herself to believe in the birth that was about to occur, to marry Joseph, and raise their child together.

What is the point?  The point is that in our humanity, we sometimes need to witness a miracle or two before we are truly willing to take a leap of faith, to give birth to whatever we are giving birth to whether in a business, in a relationship, or in the renewal of our health.  But if Mary could have fear and doubt and still move forward, so can we.

But when do you move forward and when do you step back?  You move forward once you have transcended your attachments and aversions to the birth trying to happen in your life right now.  Whatever that birth is, get mentally quiet about it.  If you have a method of doing that, good.  If not, feel free to speak to me about how that can be done in a deliberate way.

Once you are mentally quiet and the confusion has stopped, you can receive what is commonly called an intuition, which is simply one more thought, this time born of silence, from the heart, not the head.  That is my definition: Intuition is a thought born of the heart.  Once quiet mentally, you are ready to move forward with your true intuition in faith.  Faith is simply the sense that you KNOW what to do; you KNOW what is right and what serves the highest good of everyone including yourself.  You are no longer making circles inside your head in confusion.  You are clear.  You KNOW what you will give birth to and you do.

The key is not the particular choice that is made. The key is that we make our decision for or against taking a step forward in our lives from a certain place – from our intuition that rises from our heart, the quiet place of knowing.  All decisions made there will result in the greatest good in our lives and the greatest sense of contentment. I wish you your greatest good and your greatest contentment, whatever you decide!

May you be truly rewarded this coming year in all of the births of your life.  May you come to the point of full faith, to where you know what is true for you and act on it.

Have  very Merry  Christmas and a Happy and very “Mary New Year”!

Would you choose to live in presence today?

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NOTE: This is an excerpt from my book on raising consciousness that will be further edited prior to publication. If you have any feedback, please send me a comment via the “Contact Me” page above. Thank you.

Copyright © 2011 by Universal Ideas, LLC.  All rights reserved.

Posted in doubt, fear, intuition, presence | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Laws of Success: Spiritual Understanding is the Root Cause of All Success

Posted on November 26, 2011 by David Durand

Would you choose to live in presence today?

Behind everything in the physical is the spiritual.  Often we spend too much time working in the physical to “make things happen” in our lives.  The root cause of all success in relationships, health, and abundance is spiritual in nature. 

To be clear, I am talking about an experiential spiritual understanding, not an intellectual understanding, although the latter can be a starting place that leads to the actual experience.  Oprah calls such moments of understanding her “Ah hah!” moments.  It is a deep level of intuitive knowing.  Knowing that a particular person is going to play an important role in your life, knowing that in your essence you are healthy, and knowing that simply by being and acting from your presence that you have no doubt that “I am well taken care of.”  That knowing is what I am calling spiritual understanding.

Examples of making things happen rather than allowing them to happen through spiritual understanding would include:

– In relationships: Attempting to convince someone to go out with you.  Convincing is mental, not spiritual.  Love is allowing the other person to be what they are.

Another example?  A physical connection with someone is meaningless without a common spiritual understanding and connection.  This connection has been symbolized artistically by the picture of a naked couple embracing in the middle of a lotus flower.  “Having sex” is physical connection by force, while “making love” is about the complete connection of two people, ultimately spiritual in nature.

– In health: Taking a drug to force a weight reduction.  Take away the drug and the weight comes right back.

Taking antidepressants while not investigating the root causes of the depression is using medical “force” to make someone happy.  Take away the drugs and you have a depressed person again.  I do feel there is a role for anti-depressants in those not ready to face themselves, but it’s still happiness by pharmacological exertion.

– In abundance: Working three jobs to make three times a small amount of money.  This would be a loving act if it were done without fear for the purpose of a family’s survival.  This would not be a loving act if it were being done due to greed or attachment (for example,  to own the latest electronic equipment etc.).

Beating a competitor by lowering prices to unnatural levels until they are driven out of business is another example of success through force.  And there’s karma to pay back whenever we use force in the world.

All of our good flows from spiritual understanding.  Working or thinking hard without that understanding causes us to spin our wheels and sweat a lot often in a state of fear.  If instead of thinking hard, we think intuitively and get it right in the spiritual realm, the work we are called to do may appear great to others, but we have no resistance to it, so it is easy for us to accomplish.  Our life’s work and the good of our life show up together.  This is true success.

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Would you choose to live in presence today?

NOTE: This is an excerpt from my book on raising consciousness that will be further edited prior to publication. If you have any feedback, please send me a comment via the “Contact Me” page above. Thank you.

Copyright © 2011 by Universal Ideas, LLC.  All rights reserved.

Posted in abundance, laws of success, presence, spiritual laws | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment